Imagine Your Victory Freedom Pages

Thoughts on Race

 

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.Martin Luther King, Jr.Minister, Civil Rights ActivistEpisode 1:  I accidentally bumped into a guy in the hallway in high school.  I said, “I’m sorry.”  He said, “Watch where you are going black bitch!”

Episode 2:  In college I’m working in the tutoring center.  A young lady enters and says, “I need help.  But not from some nigger off the street like her.” I was the only black person in the room. I stand up. The room freezes. She runs out.

Episode 3:  In an upper level English class my professor explains how African drummers were too stupid to use a stick to play the drums, so they use their hands. He chuckles at his own comments.  The class is silent.  He realizes its the wrong crowd.

Episode 4:  After visiting some acquaintances, with NO conversation of politics, a man feels the need to tell me that President Obama is muslim, a liar and he is the worst thing that ever happened to our country.

Episode 5:  We visited a predominantly white church and though it is packed to capacity the row where we chose to sit remained empty because no one would sit next to my family.

This is my experience in America.  This is not a history book.  There were no white hooded men burning crosses.  There was no Jim Crow to uphold this wrong.  But it happened.

The hatred that I’ve read, heard, lived and experienced is real.  It’s hard. It’s hurtful. It’s hateful. It’s here.  This is my reality.  I feel it when I offer a comment that is discounted or ignored, then a white male counterpart says THE SAME THING and it is honored and celebrated and revered.

My skin color makes me mute to some.  My skin color makes me repulsive to others.  A bitch.  A nigger off the street.  A threat.  A fool.  A fear.  A waste.

But the blessing for me is that these opinions don’t make medon’t make a majority, don’t make my heart hard, don’t make me hate. Instead, I choose love.  I choose forgiveness.  I choose, “Loving my neighbor even if they don’t love me.”

My prayer:  Don’t define a person by their skin color.  Examine your beliefs.  Don’t resort to calling names.  Don’t let fear keep you in a bubble. Live love and live loved!

Love makes a difference to those who are different. Love makes a friend.  Love lets the guard down, the stranger in, the words be soft, the heart be softer.

Love never fails.

Jesus left these words for times when I wanted to fight back, punch, scream, kick, reflect the mirror of ugly I received.  He gave me these words and I give them to you:

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. — Jn 13:34

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 I want my life to be marked by my love, even when I have been hated, insulted and hurt.  I want love to define me, not defense.  I want love to be my character, my motto, my road, my light, my life.

Love over everthing!

Thank you for reading.  I would love to read your comments below.

 

 

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31 Comments

  • Tesha,Thank you for sharing your experience. What you have shared matters. What you say matters. Your voice carries weight and healing. Thank you again!
  • I am not shocked only saddened. I have faced issues throughout my life at various ages of my life. All I can do is hold my head up and keep going. I have also experienced from the other side. Not black enough or too white. I can only hope and pray that my kids wI’ll have a better life then I. There are good pockets and bad everywhere and I’m fortunate to have spent more time in the good areas.
    • Hi Rose, You are right there is good and bad every where. So many of us share a kinship of rejection, but we have a choice to invest, as you have in the next generation! Live loved. Thank you for reading.
  • As a black woman I have been put in the position to answer for all black people. My mother told me when I was a child I could have white friends, but as soon as one felt outsmarted by me they would call me the n-word. It happened twice. I live in South Korea and not a day goes by that I am not stared at. I’ve stood in line and had some think it was ok to feel my twist. I too have had people pronounce their hatred for Obama to me for apparently no good reason. And I have been told I speak well, write well and that I am not like any of their other black friends. But I have received some hatred from my own people too because I don’t go to church, attended Oxford and thus feel like I’m better then them and am not like their other black friends. This is the story of black people, yet we are resilient and keep it moving forward despite the insults, institutional racism and lack of headstart.
    • Hi Stacey, What I love about your comment is that your hardships are steeped in hope. You could have been bitter, but you chose better. I appreciate your sentiments. Thank you for reading.
  • It makes me sad to think this kind of thing goes on in our country. I don’t know why we can’t all just accept each other, you know?
    • Hi Robin. Crazy things still happen, but crazy good things happen too. Hoping for more blessings than burdens. Thank you for reading.
  • I’m sorry you’ve had to experience that. My first instinct is to say, “Dang girl, you been around the wrong people!” but the truth is, racism is rampant and it’s everywhere. It lives among people of ALL races, and it is ALWAYS damaging, and no person should ever be reduced to a skin color.I love Morgan Freeman’s view on this: “Don’t call me a black man, and I won’t call you a white man.”The sooner we can begin to recognize each other with kindness, as fellow humans, the better we’ll all be. But in the meantime, please know that while racism lives in all races, it does not live in all people. It doesn’t live in me as a difference among people or a reason for hatred. For me, skin color is a descriptor and nothing more, no different than using eye or hair color. And I have taught my children the same, because skin color doesn’t make a person.
    • Hi Brandi, Those are incredible words from Morgan Freeman. I’m holding out hope that my hardships will teach people that repaying evil for evil won’t solve a thing. Its a crazy world but there is hope. Thanks for reading.
  • Oh my goodness, this breaks my heart. Thank you for educating people. The really sad thing is, no one is born hating, it is taught. We should focus on the qualities a person possess and now what they look like.
  • It’s crazy to think that this stuff STILL happens. Ridiculous. I’m outraged just reading it.
    • Thank you for reading. Yes, it is crazy, but I always tell my children that their generation could be the one to end it. There is hope.
  • Wow, I am so sorry you had to deal with such ignorance. I hate when people treat other human beings poorly like this. It’s disgusting. I do appreciate your honesty though. I’m sure there are some that don’t realize things like this truly happen.
  • very sad to read this, there is no difference between personnes no matter the color, the ethnicity, the religion… I don’t know how those persons think it is too sad I am even angry, i am sorry that you had to passe by those stupid person, but we become great person from difficult experiences…
  • Eye opening post! As a black man i understand as my field may be one of the least diverse out there. Great time reading this today
  • I am so happy you choose love over hate despite your experiences. All this hate is so terrible to hear about and watch. I wish people would just love each other.
  • I am so sorry you had ti deal with this in your life. Love is the answer to anything!
  • wow thats crazy. I love how you choose to be better not bitter and be the bigger person.
  • Your post has really made me pensive. The reality is out there, and no matter how hard we close our eyes, it never goes away. I like what you say, “These experiences don’t make you” May God continue to be your source and strength. Thanks for sharing. xo
  • I really can’t understand why in today’s world people still act this way, why people are still so ignorant. I’m so sorry that this has been your experience and I know that you are not alone in experiencing this. It is so unacceptable and it truly hurts my heart. The saddest part about this, I think, is that people are not born with hate and ignorance, it is a learned behavior. It needs to stop!
  • It’s a shame to know that you still have to go through all these today, Tesha. Keep making your voices heard. We are all behind you. We all want a world filled with love. Sending you lots of blessings all the way from Malaysia. :)
  • It breaks my heart that you had to have those experiences, and knowing that you are not alone in having them. It speaks volumes about your character that you choose love and don’t let them define you. You’re incredibly strong! My prayer is that humanity can someday do the same. xo
  • May you find comfort and strength in His words. I read this words and thought to share it here. “We who are clay blended by the Master Potter, come from different hues. What should it matter that one bowl is dark and the other pale, if each is of good design and serves its purpose well.”
  • Thank you for sharing this very personal post. Even though I’m sad to hear you had such an experience
  • It is screwed up that people think things like that. It must be hard to take the high road when people say ignorant things.
  • Iam so sorry that you have been treated this way, it is awful! So glad you are not letting it get to you. Love is a wonderful thing and a brilliant choice to make! Held your head up high and keep smiling!
  • I trust with His words also especially on my situation right now I put all my trust and He never fails He amaze me on how he’s working and use other people just to send help for me.

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