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5 Habits to Prove It’s NOT ALL ABOUT YOU – Guest Post by Tricia Goyer

Our guest blogger for today is Tricia Goyer.  Tricia Goyer is a busy mom of six, grandmother of two, and wife to John. Somewhere around the hustle and bustle of family life, she manages to find the time to write fictional tales delighting and entertaining readers and non-fiction titles offering encouragement and hope. A bestselling author, Tricia has published thirty-three books to date and has written more than 500 articles. She is a two time Carol Award winner, as well as a Christy and ECPA Award Nominee. In 2010, she was selected as one of the Top 20 Moms to Follow on Twitter by Tricia is also on the blogging team at and other homeschooling and Christian sites.In addition to her roles as mom, wife and author, Tricia volunteers around her community and mentors teen moms. She is the founder of Hope Pregnancy Ministries in Northwestern Montana, and she currently leads a Teen MOPS Group in Little Rock, AR. Tricia, along with a group of friends, recently launched, sharing ideas about simplifying life. She also hosts the weekly radio podcast, Living Inspired. Learn more about Tricia at   Pick up a copy of her book “The Swiss Courier” for on $1.99 by clicking here.  

She is a wonderful woman of God and an inspiration to me.  Enjoy her post today! 

5 Habits to Prove It’s {Not} All About You


Our world is in desperate need of family members who strive to be servant leaders. No matter what the sitcoms say, family life is not about outsmarting others to get what you want or putting down others to make yourself look better. In fact, if you look around, too much of this is displayed not only on the television, but in the homes in your city and on your block. Too many people throw in the towel on commitment and instead they pick up their boxing gloves, fighting for individual fulfillment. And if you listen closely, the mantra you might hear bouncing of the hearts of family members is “It’s all about me.”

         Of course, Jesus’ followers are called to something different—something so unique and appealing that people sit up to notice, “What in the world?” That difference is love shown by a servant heart. A husband opening the door for his wife and complimenting her. A wife snuggled to her husband’s side with a hand on his knee and a smile. Children speaking to their parents with respect and volunteering to help within the house. Scenes like this get your attention don’t they? Jesus knew they would. In John 13:35 Jesus says, “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (NIV).

         In many families love has become misplaced and reinterpreted as you love me if you do xyz…. Instead, two other motivations reign: self-promotion (pride) and self-protection (fear). We are afraid to give our whole hearts to another because we don’t want to be hurt and indifference moves in. Intimacy is replaced with isolation.


The good news is that there is a better way. There is a perfect leadership role model you can trust, and His name is Jesus.


         There is a way to lead within your home that honors God and restores health and effectiveness. It is the way Jesus calls us to follow as leaders: to serve rather than be served.

         How we do that makes a difference. Every morning when we wake up, the Evil One—also known as the devil—is waiting to hook our false pride or fear and focus our energy on self-serving interests. To be parents who lead like Jesus, we need to resist this temptation and renew our daily commitment to stay on track and serve rather than be served.

         As Jesus moved through His season of earthly leadership, He was often tempted to go off course. He was continually pressured to respond to the failings of His friends and enemies. Yet He stayed on track with His mission by practicing the following five key habits that countered the negative forces arrayed against Him.


The First Habit: Solitude. Jesus modeled solitude as an integral, strategic component of His leadership. In solitude and prayer, away from the hopes and hurts of those who looked to Him with high and compelling expectations, Jesus again received instructions on the best use of the next day from the Father.


The Second Habit: Prayer. As Jesus demonstrated, prayer and solitude often go together. Prayer isn’t just a wish list; it’s a way to quiet yourself and commune with the Lord. As Jesus prayed,


“Our Father in heaven,

hallowed by your name,

your kingdom come,

your will be done

on earth as it is in heaven.”

(Matthew 6:9-10, emphasis added)


The Third Habit: Studying and Applying Scripture. Jesus knew the Scriptures. Just in the Sermon on the Mount alone Jesus quoted from the books of Deuteronomy, Exodus and Leviticus.


The Fourth Habit: Accepting God’s Unconditional Love. Jesus stayed close to His Father by constantly trusting His Father’s unconditional love, even to the end.


The Fifth Habit: Involvement in Supportive Relationships. Even as Jesus spoke to thousands, he had a small group of disciples and close friends who he counted on.


The responsibilities, distractions, and occasional conflicts of family life can pull any well-meaning parent off track, but if you focus on these five habits your focus will be on God, and you will learn it’s all about Him.

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