Imagine Your Victory Freedom Pages

I Made Love Wrong – Part 2

ARE YOU (1)You can always find someone to agree with your decisions. Whether they are right or wrong!  You can find someone who will support you.  Isn’t that crazy!  You can find a voice that will tell you, “Do what makes you happy.”  “You deserve this”  “Follow your heart.”

But when your closest family and friends raise concerns and you feel as if you should forge ahead without their support, that often leads to disaster.  Pay attention to your true support network.  If your mother, your best friend of twenty years and your favorite cousin all have concerns about Mr. Wonderful, then chances are there is something to it.

The man God has for you is a divine piece to the puzzle.  He will fit.  I’m not suggesting that there will be perfect harmonious blending of all facets from day one.  I am suggesting that if World War III breaks out at the mention of his name, then you may want to take some time to consider the reasons that those closest to you are raising.  There is NO conspiracy against your happiness.

When my god-daughter shared with me that she was considering marriage, I gave her a piece of advice that I hope influenced her.  I told her to go through pre-marital counseling, but only with a counselor/pastor whose yes or NO she would respect.  When we don’t care whether they deem us ready or not ready, then the counseling has no power.

Prize sisters –  Promise me that you will respect the concerns of your closest family and friends.  They DO want you to be happy.  They DO want you to succeed.  They WILL want to celebrate with you in the high times, and even though they will lift you up if the bottom falls out, they DON’T want to see you hurting or heartbroken.

Nothing hurts more than to see a loved one drowning in sorrow because she didn’t want to or chose not to heed the numerous warnings from those who truly love her.

Whose YES do your respect?  Whose NO would you reject?  Honestly evaluate your circle and make a list of your review committee.  There are people in my circle who give me godly, good feedback.  I respect their opinions, and when I have questions they can point me to the word of God or pray for me so that I can hear from God clearly.

Meditate on these scriptures:

Psalm 37:30-32 The godly offer good counsel; they teach right from wrong. They have made God’s law their own,  so they will never slip from his path.

Proverbs 11:14 Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.

Who is in your circle?  Who needs to be in?  Who needs to be out?  Give it some thought an share with us!

Leave a comment for us about the people whose opinion you really value. 

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22 Comments

  • The people we love always mean well, that’s what I have found, over the years.
    • Hi Carol, That is so true! The people who love us most support us even when we don’t recognize it! Thanks for your comment.
  • This is a really good take on considering advice! I especially love your quote: “There is no conspiracy against your happiness”. Sometimes people think there really is when your support network is really trying to do just that…support you!
    • Hi Jessica, You are right! Support looks different from people who really love you. They tell you what you really need instead of what you want to hear. thank you for your comment.
  • I agree that one should always listen to those who love them and have their best interests at heart. Everyone can’t be wrong at once? But its hard to listen to people sometimes.
    • Hi Carmen, It is difficult to listen to advice that may be contradictory to what one feels. Nonetheless it is important. I am so glad you shared that comment. You are right. Everyone can’t be wrong.
  • This is interesting! I had all of the feelings to go ahead with my husband but my family is only now (5 years after we got married) starting to accept him.
    • Hi Britney, Thanks for your comment. As long as you heard and considered their concerns before moving forward… some people just ignore everything.
  • This is great advice, unless you have a poor choice of friends, I do value their opinions, although I can say personally no one thought fondly of my relationship choice, but 9 years later people are realizing that maybe their first judgements were wrong. I think it can go both ways, but hearing everyone out, especially people you know that love you, is Important.
    • Hi Heather, You raise a great point there are exceptions to every rule. You have to know your support system and whether their opinions are trustworthy. Thanks for your comment.
  • Girl…AMEN! Pre marriage counseling is so important, as are the opinions of those you know have only your best interests at heart.
    • Hi Sharon, Thank you for your comment. Pre-marital counseling is very important. Marriages with a strong foundation and lots of support are the marriages that last.
  • The only true person that I value is my wife, she has showed me that I can count on her through thick and thin. She has accepted me the way I am and supports every decision I make, even if it means quitting my job and our only source of income to pursue my degree. Thank you for sharing this post with us.
    • Thank you for your comment Edgard! You wife sounds like an awesome person. It is good to hear about couples that support each other in every way. Make sure you invite her to see your comment! 🙂
  • Sometimes our inner circle sees things we can’t see. In the end it’s our decision,but it always wise to listen to those whom you call friends.
    • Hi Julee, Thanks for your comment. I know that my closest friends will tell me what I need to hear and respect whatever decision I make.
  • I am very thankful to have my parents in my circle. They have given me great advice.
  • Interesting.. Your post made me think more about love! and to evaluate who needs to be in and who needs to be out.
    • Hi Vidya, Thanks for your comment! I’m glad that you are evaluating the situation differently. We are appreciate your readership!
  • “Follow your heart.” – lovely motion but not very realistic these days. I think a good balance is needed between a heart and a head.
  • I am not sure people can really follow their hearts these days. Some thinking is always in order to achieve a good balance.

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